I hate the summer car situation in my house. The cars are constantly being jostled around so that you never know which one is available. One time, I got ready to leave, only to realize that I wasn’t leaving because there were no cars left. I miss Bert (the SUV of questionable origin). Bert has everything I need. Bert has my sunglasses, my readers, sunscreen, mints, hand lotion, wet wipes, allergy medication, heartburn medication, ibuprofen, etc., etc. The other cars have strange stuff like dirty socks, random sweatshirts, oddball shoes, and what-the-hell-is-this-anyway.

Anyone that thinks that their small children present a detriment to a good night’s sleep has not parented teenagers. Anyone that thinks that their small children keep them tied to their house, has not parented teenagers. At least you can get a babysitter for small children. Teenagers, not so much.

I was spinning in my basement on my jalopy of a spin bike when I reached for my designated work-out towel (which I was changing out once a week). I noticed a bug in the towel, so I shook it out just before I was going to wipe it on my face to absorb the copious amount of sweat that I manage to produce. I shook out two bugs that I thought were stink bugs and thought, “gross.” From the top of my bike, I couldn’t really see what I shook out, but the bugs were moving around so I decided to investigate closer. They were wasps. I must have woken them up because they were moving slow. I now change out my towel every day. Those stings would have looked and felt fantastic all over my face!

We were at the cottage a couple weekends ago. I got into the shower only to realize that none of my regular shower stuff was in there. And there was no bar of soap. I like a regular bar of soap. None of this body wash stuff for me. It just seems like a hassle and it never seems to suds up enough. Well, now I have a dilemma because I don’t have readers in the shower, so I can’t read the myriad of bottles lined up in the shower. It was trial and error. I’m still not sure that I didn’t wash my hair with body wash and condition it with lotion. Why aren’t those things written in HUGE lettering? And where’s my simple bar of soap?

We went to the cottage to get some stuff done the weekend before Memorial Day weekend. We needed a new fan/light combo in the bathroom because the one that was there didn’t actually move any air. I could hear it spin, but nothing was moving. It was like a fan with no blades. Now, years ago, Travis’ brother left us two exhaust fans that they had picked up at a garage sale, but never used. Travis and Merle were going to use one of those. Well, it turns out one of them was the right size, but it didn’t work. The other worked, but was the wrong size and it lacked a light, which I argued for, in the interest of safe shower shaving. I thought I was arguing that we should just order a NEW one that fit and had a light and would move copious amounts of steam from the bathroom. Travis and Merle would have none of it. At the expense of many hours and other projects, they rigged together a combo of the two that sort of works, if you don’t mind you light coming through the slats of the fan cover. And Travis got to spend quality time in the attic to install the improperly sized contraption. Seriously, Haldemans, buy a new fan. At Travis’ hourly rate, that is one really expensive, and ugly, fan.

I’m out of space, but I have to share one more thing. The other day, Tayden and I were in the McDonalds drive thru. We were stuck at a T with another vehicle, since we were in the inside lane and had to wait for that car to pull forward. While we were stuck looking directly at the driver of that car, she proceeded to pop a particularly difficult zit on her chin. As if that wasn’t enough, she then pulled out tweezers (oh yes she did) and started plucking chin, mustache, and yes, even nose hairs…in the drive thru. When did this become acceptable? Tayden was struggling with where to look, since she was RIGHT in front of us. BLAH!

With that, I hope you are enjoying your summer. We are mostly enjoying ours over here in crazy land. Let us know if you have time for a visit. We love new stories and I’m sure you have some. Remember to change out your work-out towels, leave your tweezers in the glove box, keep a pair of readers in the bathroom, and lock up your teenagers. And that’s that.