I realize that it’s been a while since I posted a blog. It was particularly difficult because both Christmas and New Year’s day fell on Wednesdays. But I’m back. And it’s back to work time, so it’s back to blog time. 

We went on our annual Haldeman family ski trip over the break. As usual, it was a blast. We added Abby, Trent’s girlfriend to the trip this year. She fit right in with the Halde-crazies. As usual, there were shenanigans. I love Boyne Mountain, but their main express six-person chairlift has a very difficult drop off point. It is nearly flat, which makes getting off the lift particularly tough. For three days, I tried unsuccessfully to perfect my exit, yet I never did. And I’m a pretty good skier. Some people had trouble at the bottom of the lift too, since they forced three from each line to fill in each chair. It didn’t really bother me because I got to talk to total strangers every time we used that lift…and they couldn’t get away. One time, the group in front of us, but in the other group of three, was having trouble. There was a couple with a child. The dad looked like a skier with a little experience, but the wife and kid were definitely struggling. As the chair came around, the dad helped the boy, but the mom hesitated. After nearly getting taken out by the chair, she was forced to wait for the next chair. She ended up on our chair. She seemed pretty nervous on the way up. I knew I would be no help to her since I myself struggled with getting off the chairlift. As we get to the top, the chair in front of us was having some trouble exiting. The dad was trying to help his son, but ended up crossing his own skis. The lift operator slowed the lift to give them more time. The dad bumped the person next to him, which caused some sort of chain reaction. The only person to escape was the one on the far left. The next one next to the escapee reached for the chair to stop himself from falling and ended up grabbing the bar that you can pull down in front of you while riding up on the lift to help you feel safer. This particular bar also had ski rests. So, while the three other people still had not regained their footing (and now they are desperately running out of space), the foot rests slam into their backs, pushing them onto their faces and pinning them to the ground…and it’s still moving, so they are sliding across the snow on their faces, pinned by the footrests. The guy on the left is trapped on top of one footrest, so all his weight is guaranteeing that the rest of the group cannot get up. The operator stops the lift and runs out to help.

This whole time I hear a loud high pitched wail, which I ignored, completely transfixed by the developing disaster in front of me. It was the mom, who was on our chair. The whole thing was surreal. By that point, we were able to step off the lift while it was stopped. I watched the mom, and she did fine (not that I was overly proficient on this particular lift). Tessa had popped off her skis and was trying to help the chair operator (she was already at the top) unlock the puzzle of people trapped and pinned by the leg rest bar. The lift operator moved like a pro, popping off everyones’ skis and moving them around. Tessa ended up organizing their skis and poles and handing them back to each person. It all worked out in the end, but I’m not sure that little boy will ever take a chairlift again. I’ve seen some bizarre things on the hills (mostly things we have done), but I have never seen a rogue chairlift bar pin a whole group of skiers. 

We also learned on this trip that Taryn knows a whole different language. I believe it is actually English, but sped up to an impossible speed and pitch. With seven people, two bathrooms, and a tendency to need the bathrooms at the same time, sometimes there is bathroom backup. At one point, Taryn needed a bathroom with some urgency, and there was none to be had. She was almost speaking in tongues (not that I have ever heard that before). We could only understand every 100th word of so. It went like this…”blah blah blah blah Tessa, blah blah blah, shower, blah blah blah toilet, blah blah blah NOW, blah blah blah AAAAAARGH!!!! I felt so bad for her, but in typical Haldeman style, none of us could stop laughing. She got into a bathroom in time…barely…so it all ended well, but we all learned that Taryn is a speed talker. I may have her try for a job as an auctioneer. She is that good!

That’s all for today! I will have more shenanigans next week. Happy New Year everyone!