The world lost a great man Sunday. His name was Vic Potocki, but I knew him as Pa P. Sometimes, in life, a friendship develops that is so close and so real that that person’s parents take you as one of their own. That is the case with my friendship with Laura. See, Pa P is her dad. Our friendship started over 30 years ago when I met Laura’s sister, Donna. While Donna joined the navy and served honorably, moving out of and back into the country, and then across the country, Laura and I became inseparable… really more like sisters without the fights, not that I needed more sisters. And her parents took me in, not that I needed additional parents. Or maybe I did need more parents because they couldn’t make rules fast enough to keep up with our shenanigans. Honestly, it seems like the heart has an unrestrained capacity to love, so we all just expanded our hearts to make room for each other. As Travis and I got more serious, the Potocki’s took him in too, not that he needed additional parents. 

Pa P was the quintessential family man. He loved his girls with passion, flare, and much sarcasm. He needed that sarcasm to survive. How could I not love him? He took me on with all my quirks… and I have many. I remember one specific evening, we were sitting in their TV room watching something or another. This super awkward commercial came on where a guy bails on golfing with his buddies because his wife asked him to stay home. The commercial cut back and forth from the golf buddies to the guy and his wife. The golfers were commenting on how the wife was working the missing guy like a dog, never letting him go out. Meanwhile, the guy and his wife were leaving a trail of clothes through the house. As the hot and steamy scene was escalating, the kids (that was me at the time) were getting more and more uncomfortable. This is why kids don’t watch R rated movies with their parents, right? So, to ease the mounting pressure I pipe in, “Well, at least it’s his wife.” Did I mention that Laura’s uncle was there. Yup… he was introducing his girlfriend to the extended family. The girlfriend that he had just left his wife for. Yup. I think of this exact moment every time I see one of those “wanna get away” Southwest commercials. Oh, I wanted to get away, because I knew the back story, so my comment was followed by a silence that far eclipsed the awkwardness of the commercial. Shortly thereafter, Laura, Donna, and I ran out the door to head to the Four Lakes Pub, where nothing good ever happened. So yes, I was also old enough to know better. The next time I saw Pa P, he just couldn’t stop laughing about it. He wasn’t mad at all. He just gave me a big Pa P bear hug and thanked me for one of the best stories ever. While I know that this may be difficult to believe, that story still makes an occasional appearance amongst the Potocki crew.

Through the years, the Potocki clan and the Haldeman clan have moved two states apart. With all our kiddos activities and jobs, we would go great stretches of time without seeing Ma and Pa P. At the end of August, Travis and I stopped by Wisconsin on our epic journey to the upper peninsula , but Pa P was in the hospital for his heart, so we didn’t get to see him. On this past Sunday, his heart got the best of him. Perhaps there is comfort in knowing that he spent his last day fixing Laura’s dishwasher, working on the cars, and playing cards, surrounded by some of the family he loved. I like to think that that’s how he would have wanted to spend his last hours on this earth. And although he wasn’t a part of my everyday life, there is a gaping hole in the space that he filled with his big bear hugs, hearty laugh, and love of life. My heart goes out to Ma P, Laura, Donna, the grandkids, and all the rest of the Potocki clan. He was the man that was always there for you. The rock that you could call to talk about problems with your car or problems with your kids. An amazing grandpa, with endless love for his grandkids. I cannot even express my sadness. I want to race up to Wisconsin to be with you all, but I have to wait for my negative Covid test from an exposure from one of the divers I coach. I hate this Covid time. I know that at some point in the future, I will get up to Wisconsin to celebrate the life of Pa P, a man who will always live large in my memory. 

Rest well Pa P. We love you… Jo and the Doc