On Monday, we returned from a week-long family vacation in Florida. There were eight of us in my group, including my core six and Taryn’s boyfriend, Wolfe, and Tessa’s boyfriend, Nick. We also met up with Travis’ parents, Trav’s sister Krishna and her fiancée Jeff, and his brother Clayton and his wife Heidi. This story needs to start at the end. When we were getting ready to leave, we knew we had extra time, but I reasoned that we should just get our two Ubers to the airport and eat at the airport, rather than risk arriving late. What I didn’t know is that I could not check-in our one checked bag prior to two hours before the flight, so we had to stay on the outside of security to eat. Fortunately, there was a restaurant before security (whew!). We had a great time whooping it up in the quiet restaurant, including Travis playing a few songs on his guitar. Afterwards, we backtracked to the check-in counter to check the bag, which now had a line. Taryn and Wolfe proceeded ahead through security to thin our group a little. I needed a few of us available to toss stuff out of the checked bag into carry-ons if we went over weight, which we did. 

So, yes, not surprisingly, we are those people clogging up the line, tossing decks of cards and boxes of games around to lighten the load. We needed the checked bag primarily for tubs of sunscreen, games and cards, and a sun tent. Sorry to everyone in line behind us. Things didn’t get really exciting until we went through security. We always get a couple bags pulled to get manually checked, and Taryn always gets pulled aside to check something questionable that she apparently has implanted in the back of her neck. This time, it was Tayden’s bag that got pulled for the manual. So, while Tayden is up by the counter where they check the bag, the remaining five of our crew at that point, were redressing ourselves in the smallest, skinniest security exit point that I have encountered. This poor TSA agent had to dig through Tayden’s mass of dirty clothes that he apparently just dumped into the bag, much like a hamper. This went on for a while, then another TSA agent joined the hunt… then another… then another… then another… then another, until there were six in total. We were supportive in our usual way, which means that we were barely in control of our laughter regarding the new security profile, which included 18 year old, pasty white (thanks to the sunscreen), nerdy, red-heads. It’s always those red-heads. 

In defense of TSA, they were on a shift change, but they needed to clear this bag, or the poor guard that started searching the bag just needed to figure out what triggered the double check. Poor Tayden was stuck listening to our conversation and trying to contain his laughter. Eventually, the six agents opted to run it through the machine again. That something was still triggering inside his bag, so we were back at the manual check. This time, I walked up to try to see what was so concerning and to rib Tayden on his upgraded status as a threat to national security. There was a large lump of smaller lumps in the corner of the bag. It looked like a disturbing mammogram. Tayden could give no insight, so two guards went at it, actually removing clothes this time, utilizing the full length of their counter. Finally, a guard produced a small drawstring bag full of magnetic rocks that Tayden had purchased at a gift shop in Siesta Key. Tayden’s taste in mementos for a trip haven’t changed since he was four. The only purchase he had to remind him of the trip was the highly suspicious magnetic rocks. The long suffering TSA agents gladly loaded up Tayden’s bag, and I think they did a little victory dance at solving the mystery. 

We moved our boisterous crowd to the pre-boarding area, still laughing. It was the perfect ending to a great vacation. I’m thinking about hiding those rocks in any bag that Tayden takes on any future trips, just for kicks. Have a great week everyone! And yes, we are the reason that it takes so long in the check-in line and at security. It doesn’t matter how organized I think I am, we are part of the problem.