I’ve mentioned in a few blogs that I am a lunch lady. I often think of the Chris Farley and Adam Sandler skit “Lunch Lady Land” as I am going to work. I actually went back to being a lunch lady after spending a year as the middle school treasurer. I loved my coworkers there, but maybe desk jobs aren’t for me. Sometimes I believe that the people that really understand the behind-the-scenes things at a school are the custodians and the lunch ladies. And both those groups are hard-working people. 

In January, I started going into work with the earlier crew. Not the early, early crew that goes in at 6am. That ‘s just too early, and nobody would want me there at that time. I’m in the second group at 8:45 or 9. I got this spot when one of our cooks retired. NO, NO, I am not cooking. Let’s not get crazy. I’d probably burn the place down. I do part of the side prep. This includes mashed potatoes. In fact, I now refer to certain days as mashed potato day. That’s because I am guaranteed to be way behind on any mashed potato day. Most people (which used to include me) have no idea what it’s like to make 50 to 70 pounds of mashed potatoes. I will admit that they are instant mashed potatoes, but we use a superior type called pearls. And I hand whip them with a whisk. That’s a solid upper body workout on a random Tuesday morning. Because I heat up the water in the steamer, I am working beside the steamer, so I typically look like I just came from the gym after I am done, although I doubt anyone wears a hair net and an apron at the gym. If moping day falls on mashed potato day, I’m a soupy mess. 

Now I have tried all different types of methods to whip the potatoes, but no matter which method I use, there are potatoes everywhere. Although I have improved some, I think I am now plateauing. If I try to go faster, I make more of a mess, which requires me to use the time I saved cleaning my station at the end. No matter what speed I go, I end up with potatoes on me. Oddly, I seem to have an actual sheen of potatoes on my exposed skin, like my arms, face, and neck. These are the later taters. There is no way to clean them off at work. I can feel the grit on my neck, but short of hosing off in the tray cleaning station, I can’t get the sticky mess off my neck. I tell Travis that he can snack on the later taters after he is home, but he always takes a pass. Even the dish room worker (which is sometimes me) will end up with later taters. In my opinion, the dish room later taters are worse, because they come off the trays after the kids have eaten them. When I get to work the dish room on mashed potato day and moping day, I am a special kind of sticky mess. Although, I like working the dish room (oddly, all lunch ladies like the dish room) and I like eating mashed potatoes, so its a conundrum.

I have heard some say that I should use a mixer for the potatoes. The problem with a mixer is that I must have time to clean the mixer after making the potatoes. I haven’t actually tried the mixer, but the more gifted cooks in the kitchen have told me that mixing them by hand with a whisk is the fastest and cleanest way to mix them, so that’s how I do it. Anyway, who doesn’t want an arm, chest, and back workout at work? The occasional blasts of steam from the steamer just add a new dimension. Instead of visiting the steam room after a workout, I get to mix it right into the workout. Win, win right? On a side note, we have a mixer that sits at the end of an aisle that’s as tall as me. What in the world is that used for? How many pounds of potatoes could that mix?

Enjoy your week everyone. To be honest, I don’t want to work anywhere else. It’s my understanding from other lunch ladies that we work in a rare lunchroom because we all get along. It’s the only kitchen I’ve worked in (including my own), so I will have to take their word for it. I’m good like that. Living the dream!