I know, I know, CATS!! So, Apollo (aka Slim) lost his collar. Since he is an indoor cat, it would be easy to shrug it off. The problem is that my cats need their collars to eat. So now Slim can’t open his food bowl, because the chip to his food bowl is attached to his collar. The last time he lost his collar was a year ago, and it was in the Christmas tree. Seems logical. Every cat in the world wonders what good deed they did (because everything is about them) to warrant their servants (that’s us) to bring a tree INTO the house and hang shiny and cute cat toys all over it. It’s like a slice of nirvana. And since there are little pieces of my tree spread about my house,I can only imagine that the cats have been enjoying their gift. But now the collar is gone. And a lost collar is never found in the middle of the hallway,or anyplace else that is easy to find. That’s because it is a breakaway collar…and something needs to snag it for it to breakaway. So it is hidden on whatever caused it to breakaway.

There are several problems with this scenario. First, the cat can’t eat, and the bowls are in my bathroom. So now, I have to pull his bowl out from under my counter and manually open it for him, then turn the power off to it so it doesn’t close on his head, which really freaks Slim out. I also have to push it back under the counter, because Slim likes to eat in privacy. Then, I have to wait for him to finish eating, so I can close the bowl. That’s because the other cat, Bruce (aka Fatty Cat) will eat all of Slim’s food if the bowl is open. Fatty Cat is on a calorie restricted diet. He doesn’t like his calorie restriction, and meows all evening for someone, anyone, to feed him. We’ve even caught him in the sink, eating scraps that were left in the drain trap. And that’s why the restricted diet isn’t working. It’s like me thinking I can eat a half gallon of ice cream and still lose weight. We feed him at night so he doesn’t meow for food at night, and we can actually enjoy some sleep. Anyway, an open food bowl…that’s perfect for him.

So I thought I would look through the tree for the collar. I laid on the ground and used a flashlight to shine it up through the branches.Did I mention that for some reason, Slim has a green collar? After last year’s debacle, I debated changing it, but the sensor has to be sewn onto the collar,and that seemed like a lot of work for a cat collar color change. Anyway, the tree came down at the end of the season, and a green collar didn’t seem like such a bad idea anymore. Back to the flashlight and laying on the ground. I didn’t find it. That’s because only Taryn can ever find the collar in the tree.It’s one of her magical powers. She stands a few feet from the tree, examining it. Then, when she is ready, she slowly approaches the tree, thrusts her hand into the tree, and brings her hand out of the tree holding the cat collar. I’ve seen it with my own eyes. Nobody can figure it out. The problem is that Taryn doesn’t return from college until Friday night. So, it’s going to be a long week for me and for the cat. So now, both cats will be a little hungry. Good thing there’s a  tree full of cat toys for them to play with to distract them fro their grumbling bellies.

My advice…get a dog.