This is the first year in many that I am not coaching diving at the high school that I work at. I coached at Wheeler for seven years, restarting the diving program that had been dormant for several years. The first three years, I didn’t get paid. I was just happy to coach my daughter Tessa. I loved coaching Tessa. Even if we weren’t getting along at home for one reason or another (she was a teenager, after all), we always had practice. After she graduated, I guess they figured out that I didn’t have much personal motivation to keep at the grueling coaching hours, so I started getting paid. Swimming and Diving is the longest season, covering fall break, Thanksgiving break, Christmas break, and President’s weekend. The first Meet is around November 14 (although official practices start around October 23) and the sectional meet for the boys is February 17 this year. That is a few days shy of four full months. Since I coached boys and girls, the season was two weeks longer than coaches that only coach one, but still. By contrast, girls golf had their first competition August 1, and their last one September 18. Even if you add a few weeks on the front end of that, it’s only two months. Unfortunately, I am woefully under qualified to coach golf of any kind. Those of you that have had the misfortune of golfing with me know! Unless the goal is to be on a safari in between fairways, chasing the elusive white ball. 

For seven of the eight years we have been in Indiana, I have coached. This year is an emotional roller coaster. My divers have stopped in my classroom to discuss how things are going, but I just can’t bring myself to go to a meet. What is that about? Just thinking about sitting in the stands makes me overly emotional. On the flip side of that, I have been enjoying my time off. While I’ve always gone on a family ski trip over winter break, it was usually riddled with guilt and timed so I could have a practice the day we left, and a practice the day we returned. This year, no guilt. I even visited Taryn and Wolfe the week after our ski trip. That visit made me realize that even the quiet kids, who rarely ask for anything, still need Mom. How much did I give up to coach? More guilt. 

So this year, Travis and I made plans. We are doing whatever we want. Girls weekend with some Lisle friends? Yes, please! Florida? Sure! Ski weekend? Why not! But when I stop to think about not coaching, I am awash with emotions. Is there anyone else who gave up coaching a sport and knows what I am talking about? I miss that time with the students. I miss the camaraderie with the other coaches. I even miss that bad music at practices. I miss so much that even thinking about going into the pool fills me with anxiety. So I avoid. I talk to my former divers about their new dives and high scores, but I don’t go to the pool. 

This picture above is with my only boy diver last year at the sectional meet. He graduated and so did I. I just took a few years longer. Change happens when we are busy doing other things. Embrace the day! Have a great week everyone! Who knows? Maybe next week will include some driveway shenanigans!